i think she really means it…

From the “Old” Days

Tuesday, January 29th, 2008 | Random Thoughts | No Comments

I listened to Five Iron Frenzy‘s album, “Our Newest Album Ever!” today. It had been a long time since I heard their stuff, but it felt good to blast the old ska band in my classroom. My favorite song on the album is “Every New Day.” The last verse of the song moves me very deeply. In light of my current journey through selfish perfectionism and meeting my own unreasonable expectations, their words once again bring me to me knees…

Man versus himself, Man versus machine

Man versus the world, Mankind versus me.

The struggles go on, the wisdom I lack

The burdens keep piling up on my back.

So hard to breath, to take the next step.

The mountain is high, I wait in the depths.

Yearning for grace, and hoping for peace.

Dear God…INCREASE.

Healing hands of God have mercy on our unclean souls once again.

Jesus Christ, light of the world burning bright within our hearts forever.

Freedom means love without condition, a beginning or an end.

Here’s my heart, let it be forever Yours,

only You can make every new day seem so new.

The Joy of Teaching

Wednesday, January 23rd, 2008 | Sara the Teacher | 1 Comment

A weird thing happened yesterday…I wasn’t exhausted from teaching all day, even though I was at school from 6:30 to 4:00. I’ve finally reached that point in the year where my kids do most of the work, and I simply direct!

Over the first few months of the school year, I do a lot of teaching of fraction and decimal operations (adding, subtracting, multiplying, dividing). It’s challenging to get these students (who didn’t get the concepts the first 4 years they were taught, 4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th grades) to understand fractions and decimals. Especially when they’re taught so out of context. I mean, when’s the last time you added fractions with unlike denominators (or divided them…when DO we use that in real life?)? Some of them are finally getting it. The others, well, we just keep hoping, teaching, and praying!

Yesterday, we played with circumference of circles and discovered a really cool ratio…pi. It was fun to watch my kids measure the diameter and circumference of circular objects and notice that they kept coming up with 3-point-something when dividing the circumference by the diameter. “Are all circles like that, Mrs. Jones?” It was refreshing to see 8th graders having fun exploring mathematical concepts and working together.

The next few weeks will bring lessons on mark-ups and discounts (and we will “go shopping”), understanding interest rates (we’ll “buy a car”), and probability (we will make “spinner puzzles”). In addition, I will be teaching my students how to set a personal goal and work toward it over the next semester (one of the “life lessons” I teach each year). Yep, I have definitely reached the “fun” time of the school year. I wonder if the students have any idea how much their teacher enjoys school…

Deep Thoughts…

Tuesday, January 15th, 2008 | Random Thoughts | 1 Comment

It shouldn’t surprise me, but I’ve realized something about myself these last few days–I am driven by performance. I’ve always known I’ve been an over-achiever and used to look at that quality as a good thing. However, God is slowly doing a work on my heart…and its shaking up my world.

My identity has always been wrapped up in what I DO. I’m a teacher, so I spend a lot of my free time thinking about lessons, creating new games and activities, even spending time with students. Most of the time, I find my identity in being the *best* teacher (note the wording–not on being “the best teacher I can be,” rather my dentity is based on being “the best teacher”).

I am also a wife. I measure my success as a wife by how many ways and how often I take care of my husband’s needs (making meals, washing dishes, keeping the house clean, giving him time to relax, supporting him in his job and extra activities, and meeting his other needs). I don’t want to be a burden to him; I want to make his life easier.

Finally, I am a Christ-follower. I find my identity in being a Christian. I volunteer at church, host people in my home, send words of encouragement to friends when needed, pray and read my Bible. But, my identity is found in my performance of these things. After all…I want to be successful.

How do I measure success then…by performance. Because if I don’t focus on measuring success, I might fail as a teacher, wife, or Christian. Isn’t failing itself the cardinal sin of any American Christian? At least that’s what I used to think. Yet, when it comes to relationships…with Nate, with God, with others…sometimes success is not found in what I do. Then where is it found and how can I know when I’ve failed so I can successfully beat myself up and do “better” next time? And how do I let go of my performance based identity and just BE the woman, teacher, and wife God has made me? I wish there was a list of steps I could follow, but that doesn’t seem to exist…maybe that’s the point…

A *Sweet* Birthday Gift

Tuesday, January 8th, 2008 | Random Thoughts | No Comments

My parents sent me an awesome birthday present this year! I found it in the refrigerator this afternoon when I got home from work. It’s one of those edible arrangements. It tastes delicious! I’ve had to ration myself this evening…I mean, where did these people find such succulent fruit this time of year?!

I wonder if there will be any of it left on Thursday…my actual birth date!

A New Condition

Sunday, January 6th, 2008 | Random Thoughts | No Comments

Nate got me a Nintendo DS for Christmas.  I’ve been playing it non-stop!  I really enjoy the Brain Age games.  I’ve never been much of a video game player, so this is a new experience for me.  Not without sacrifice, though.  I think I’m developing a not-so-rare condition I’ll call “DS neck.”  My neck and shoulders are so stiff!

Happy New Year!

Wednesday, January 2nd, 2008 | Random Thoughts | 4 Comments

Here it is…2008! I was just reading a friend’s blog post about her family “highlights” and “lowlights” of 2007. Her list was a neat summary of all of the significant events of the past year. I thought it was a great idea and would love to reflect on some of my “high” and “low” lights as well (I hope I’m not violating any copyright laws…). › Continue reading